Check Out Your Relationships
This is a great way to look at your relationships and determine if they are healthy or not. Everyone has rights in relationships and sometimes, when we are worried about losing people or unsure where we stand with the other person/people, we forget that these rights exist. Take a minute to think about your own relationships and see whether you feel like you have the rights you deserve.
The following article is from Project Survive, which was created at the City College of San Fransisco.
If you want more information visit their website at: https://www.ccsf.edu/NEW/en/educational-programs/school-and-departments/school-of-behavioral-and-social-sciences/womens-studies/project-survive/right_questions.html.
If you want more information visit their website at: https://www.ccsf.edu/NEW/en/educational-programs/school-and-departments/school-of-behavioral-and-social-sciences/womens-studies/project-survive/right_questions.html.
Expect Respect
In any kind of relationship, whether it’s with family, friends, teachers, boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner you should expect respect. Depending on the particular ties between you and the other person, you may have different boundaries. For example, you’ll probably be closer with your mom than with your teacher. Your connection to your little brother will be different than your bond with the person you’re dating or talking to. No matter what kind of relationship it is, you can expect respect and other basic rights also.
Your Rights in a Healthy Relationship
HONESTY-
The right to not be lied to
TRUST-
TRUST-
The right to feel you can trust the other person
SAFETY-
SAFETY-
The right to feel safe
PROTECTION-
PROTECTION-
The right to protect your body
FLEXIBILITY-
FLEXIBILITY-
The right to change your mind at any time
CHOICE-
CHOICE-
The right to say NO!
NON-ABUSE AND NON-VIOLENCE-
NON-ABUSE AND NON-VIOLENCE-
The right not to be hurt in any way
Ask these questions about your dating relationship:
• Do you feel free to be yourselves around each other?
• Do you accept each other’s differences and respect each other’s opinions?
• Do you have equal decision-making power?
• Are you both willing to compromise sometimes?
• Do you each feel appreciated and liked?
• Do you solve conflicts without putting each other down?
• Do you both accept responsibilities for your actions?
• Do you make sure there is no physical or sexual abuse in your relationship?
• Do you talk about sex if you’re having it and never feel pressured to have it?
• Do you give each other space?
• Do you have some privacy (letters; e-mails; journals)?
• Do you each control your own money?
• Do you not have to worry about jealousy or fear because you both feel secure?
• Do you support each other’s individual goals in life, like getting a job or going to college?
• Do you always treat each other with respect?
Ask these questions about your dating relationship:
• Do you feel free to be yourselves around each other?
• Do you accept each other’s differences and respect each other’s opinions?
• Do you have equal decision-making power?
• Are you both willing to compromise sometimes?
• Do you each feel appreciated and liked?
• Do you solve conflicts without putting each other down?
• Do you both accept responsibilities for your actions?
• Do you make sure there is no physical or sexual abuse in your relationship?
• Do you talk about sex if you’re having it and never feel pressured to have it?
• Do you give each other space?
• Do you have some privacy (letters; e-mails; journals)?
• Do you each control your own money?
• Do you not have to worry about jealousy or fear because you both feel secure?
• Do you support each other’s individual goals in life, like getting a job or going to college?
• Do you always treat each other with respect?
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If you are worried about a relationship you are in or a relationship that your friend is having and want to talk to someone about this, Teen Link is a great resource. It is anonymous, confidential and non-judgmental. Everyone answering the phone or the online chat is also a teenager, which is nice. It is open every night from 6-10pm. The number is 1-866-833-6546 or 866TeenLink. If you want to learn more about it or want to chat the website is www.866teenlink.org.
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